Unfortunately Maria chose to walk her own way, seperate from mine. I am making this entry Sept 5th because it took me until today to come to terms with the pain this means for me. Imagine this: You meet a girl, you just *know* she is the one, but because she is focussing on herself, she could not care less. I feel like I am screaming through thick security glass but cannot be heard.
I am pondering thoughts like “what fun is life if you cannot say that you are loved?”. What a mess. My shrink will have her hands full repairing it. The only reconciliation I have is that I can still hope: seven years from now, if we are both unbound, I’ll ask her to marry me.